Signs.

Everywhere I went and everything I did today reminded me of her. Everything, son. Nonetheless, each morning she's one of the first things I think about. Real deal. And needless to say, one of the last things before I sleep, or try to sleep. Let's break it down shall we?

My Room: (No particular order.)
The first place I was conscious in was, of course, my room. I wanted to try and watch a movie, so I opened my DVD player. There was already a DVD in there because I always leave DVDs in there after finishing. The DVD was Disc Two of Monk Season One. Like all the reminders, it hit with a shock. I let her watch all the Monk seasons. I think I even introduced her to that show. And that particular disc was in there because I was watching it again to remember her. The morning was sluggish, I was idle. I looked at my rhyme book, she gave that book to me. I went on the computer, it was a medium for communication. I looked at my shoes, there was a pair we got to match. I looked at a Premier bag that I pinned on the wall for decoration and there was a little bit cut off it, I used that piece of paper to make a little card and tied it onto a sunflower that I placed on her desk, for her to discover, on Valentine's morning. I looked at my hats, hanging on my wall, there's a Bittersweet Fitted, I bought because it'd be sentimental. Also, on that wall is a picture of her, a picture of us, and a picture she drew of us. I looked in my closet at my clothes, I know which ones she's seen me wore. I look at my mirror, she looked at it before too. I look on top of my drawers and there is a book of Sudoku and nose strips, she introduced me to both of them. I looked at my DVD collection, remembered the movies we watched together; when, where, and why. I, still, see York mints on my desk, she bought me them and I never ate them all. And I looked at more folded clothes, saw the shirt she despises the most.

The Middle Level:
The Kitchen brought memories. We ate there, hung there, etc. I had been on the phone talking to a friend and was about to sit on a couch in the formal room. I stopped myself, because her and I used to sit there, sleep there, and play games there. I looked at the wall mirrors, and again, we used to look at them at the same time. The section with the table, reminded me of when we spent time there. We used to wrestle there too. A lot reminded me here, I just can't remember them all.

Downstairs:
Same to everything. Even memories in the garage.

Eastridge Mall:
I went with my sister and I went alone. I watched Bourne Ultimatum because I've been dieing to see it. We were supposed to watch it one day, but it didn't follow through. I watched alone. And again, there are countless reminders that were given from the mall. The stores, the food, etc.

Its just so hard when you were so close. I've never missed her so much. I went back in our history and relived times. Whether at my place, her place, and everywhere in between. I remembered times. Yeah, its sad and yeah, you can say I'm going through the phase. But, I have a feeling its not over. I'm not letting go. I remember all the things I gave her and all the things I was planning to give her. I remember so much, but don't remember every little reminder that came to me today. And also, what's sad, is that her birthday is coming up. I hoped that I would've been there as I was, but I'll just be there as I am now. And, the haters are happy. So oh well.