Reminder: -- - - --Checked 4/1/08

Reminder: Blog about today, March 31st, 2008, because it was definitely blog-worthy.

Over and out....
_________ Updated!

First and foremost, Happy Birthday to my brothers Renato and Reggie. I'll always have love for you both because we grew up together.


...I don't know what I'm still doing up. It's late and I have school tomorrow. I guess my body is still used to vacation time, but I'm smarter than that. Luckily, I don't have first tomorrow, but instead I set up a Starbucks date with my homies. So, I still have to rise early.

Today was a good day. I was on a serious trip however, not a trip as in going places, a trip as in I was trippin'u. I thought that I had two research papers, one for english and one for psychology, due this week. That, the english one was due on Wednesday and the psych one was due tomorrow, or today rather. I was seriously tripping, again I say.

I had errands to run today. I had to ship shoes, go to the library, and go to Goodwill to buy a piece of wooden furniture for art class. So amidst it all, again... I was trippin. I originally planned to begin my Monday bright and early at 5:30 AM playing ball with Cuts and my church brothers. That didn't happen because I didn't wake up on time. Nor, did Cuts; he slept at 4:30 AM. So when I woke up, I freshened up and went to Cuts house to box up some shoes. I also bought us breakfast; how nice of me. We boxed up the shoes and ended up hanging out for a bit. We chilled, ate, and watched Monk. I did only plan to stay as long to do what I needed to do, I was running on a busy schedule, but friendship just has a way of making things chill. My plan was to go to his house, mail the shoes, go to Goodwill and after all that be back in time for the Library to open.

I knew it all along, all throughout break, that I needed to act on my books quickly. That, I needed to check out the books that were on hold for me ASAP. That never happened though, I waited until the last minute (and I still am.) Back to the story, so I didn't fulfill that plan. By the time I was done hanging out with Cuts, it was time for the library to (supposably) open. I then went to the library. Long story short, even though I'm going to explain, it was closed. Days prior to yesterday, I've been going on the library's website to check the business hours and there were red text saying it'd be closed March 31. I never made the connection that that would be today. And adding to my stress, when I thought those papers were due, I had two crucial books waiting for me.

I said F it all and decided to go home. Allow me to say it again, "I was on a trip." I referred to it as being in Unkville, Unk-Central, or later declared as Ptown, Punk Town. I was punking myself.

I'm going to cut things short....

So, later I found out that I've forgotten that my psych paper was due at the end of the year. Dumb me. I already knew that my english paper was due on Wed, so that did lift some weight off my shoulders. But, I did also discover that one of my art pieces are due tomorrow. I tried to work on it a few hours ago, I didn't finish. It's not that important to me at the moment.

I'm all over the place right now, so indecisive, hence why I'm still awake.

I decided that I've got to finally find a piece of wooden furniture. So I swooped up Cuts, yeah, I saw him twice in a day, and we went to Goodwill. That trip, a good kind of trip, was fun. Yes.

Returning, I swooped up Steph because she needed to use my printer. Then, plus my sister, we left and I dropped my friends home. Ate and I went to practice.

Ok, so that was the choppy version of my day. You get the idea. Now to the present:

I'm sitting here, not feeling so well. I'm stressed because of the things around me, and I know that I should not feel any of this. Is it me? Is the problem within me? Do I need to fix it myself? I don't know. I do know though, that this will pass. I'm in another one of my "emo" phases, but I'm not so emo right now. Today was probably just a major head-case that's still with me. Reeking havoc on my health and future. School, my high school assignments... they don't really matter. Truth. Right now, college seems like a drag to me but I know that's not what it's going to be. I know... I'm going through the motions. I have excuses, but I can't help but feel that I'm just complaining.

I have a valid excuse for now working on my assignments over break. I really, truly wanted to though. I also wanted to hear the messages my teacher left for my parents, but I never got to. Bottom line, I didn't have the, key word, quality time. I had time, but not time destined for school work. Is it my fault? I worked four long hard days out of this "spring break." I knew times could get like this, but I wanted to get a job. Once again, am I just complaining?

I've gotten through things before and I've swallowed my pride before. Just each time I've got to, it always hurts in a different way.

I believe blogging this has relieved me a bit and now I feel like going to bed. (Yay! It worked!) Yeah, hopefully I'll go. Gotta get things set for today before I can officially fall asleep. Then, once I'm there I've got the business of actually falling asleep. That is a bittersweet problem for me. Gosh, how I don't like that word anymore. I've had episodes of insomnia, and I love them. To me, being a bit of an insomniac is cool.

I think I should shut up now. Bye.

Last minute smiles.

I finally watched Bank Job. I knew it was about to be taken out of service, so I had to get on it. Also, I finally used my employee benefit: free tickets. I treated my fam to watch it. Big ups to Fon for hooking it up with food, lol. Bank Job was tight, just how I knew it would be.

Today, I discovered within myself that I have the ability to titty jiggle. No joke, it's awesome. I even made a video.... Now, the world can see.

I'm going to wake up at 4:30 AM to play bball an hour later with peeps. I'm excited, but the fatigue and all the hw make me not want to. But, I'm going to.

Goodnight.

I can relax now.

Yesterday was my last day of work for the remainder of this break and a few days. I work again next Thursday, and that's a long time from now. So, I can finally relax. After work, LTA, alas, regrouped and kicked it. We did our normal routine, which consists of a Denny's run and a movie, or something to watch. This time, we all made a pact to get something else, not what we usually order; I usually order the Country Fried Steak. Yup, aren't we adorable? I'm still tired right now (when am I not?) so I'm going to skip along details. Basically, it was fun.

I still have things to do, like mail shoes, cash a money order, and go to the library. I'm going to attempt these today.

After I got out of work, I let Futs drive my car to the gas station. Man... hahahaha! Many stalls and discomfort. Reminded me of how I started. And then at 76, some gangsta ish happened. Haha, you'll have to ask me about this one if you're curious.

Break is almost, not basically, but almost over. I'm screwed because I never started any of my papers. No comment.... And, there are people that I still want to see before break ends. I just couldn't, due mostly to work. Yeah, work is cool because the people are nice and tight. Man, enough talk about work, geez!

Okay, I guess this is it for this lovely Sunday afternoon. Fon wants to kick it again tonight but I don't know... so we'll see.

Layta!

It's almost time to get up! But, I still gotta sleep!

It's 4:33 AM and my heart is pounding ferociously sending blood all around my body. Why? Because I have been dancing here alone in my room. Yes. That's the truth, the real reason why. I feel like I want to start popping again. Oh, how good those days were....

Work was okay yesterday and I have work today too. About eight hours of it.... And, I'm missing most of Cut's party. Gotta work Saturday too, that means I can't attend Steph's party. I so wish I could go to both parties and enjoy time with my close friends, but I can't. Hm....

Ah... I guess it seems that my heart has slowed down and is not making a racket anymore (stupid thing!) Maybe I can rest now, my body's been dying for it.

Outskis!

Factoids :: Jerome-isms.

I don't know what this will become, but it's a nice idea and it may even be a series of confessions. But, enjoy.




I cry (inside) when it's late at night and I'm alone hungry.

I never mean any harm whatsoever, just things become unfortunate.

I'm not as fast, or smart, as I used to be, and that makes me sad.

All my days are the same and I complain about them. No matter what I do they always end up occurring the same. As in, I try to sleep early but get caught up in something and end up sleeping the same time as last night, then I wake up late, again. You get the picture... I hope.

I feel as if I've lost my dream because I'm not going straight into art school.

I'm disappointed in how I do things and what those things become.

My room is always messy, except for the times I clean it; then it just becomes messy again.

I've got secrets.

I wish I could have more freedom, but the truth is I've been getting so much freedom before I could understand what it was.

I LOVE late nights when I'm awake watching a movie or something.

I can't freestyle as good as I used to.

My group never reached our goal of putting out a mixtape by '08.

I'm not kicking it as much as I used to with my group.

I'm not preparing myself as I "should" be for college future.

Working (an employment for minimum wage) is equivalent to being screwed.

I thought my car was a WRX when I got it... how stupid of me.

Now I'm making the best of it -I know I should. But deep down, I continue to fight myself about it. Refer to ^ (Yet my slab is still dope =P)

I always try to be the best in something, but I never am. And that usually makes me quit.

When my grades fall in classes, it's because I don't or am not understanding something. Then it all grows and I'm left far behind without a clue.

I ALWAYS need to have matching socks. Oh and, black socks > white socks.

I absolutely love driving or having adventures late, late at night or in the early morning.

I drive around sometimes, alone, and it clears my head, even if I have to worries. It puts me in a calm place.

I don't know how, many times, when I save lots of money it somehow decreases quickly without me using it to buy items.

I'm always conned into action, I guess it's because I'm the responsible one.

I'm journeying into a world of independence, and it scares me a bit.

I'm not scared or afraid or terrified of anything. Seriously.

I'm extremely shy and quite nervous.

I'm a good public speaker... to classrooms and enclosed groups.

I wish I never lost touch or let space fill between me and some friends, but hey, it happens.

I wish my dad would stop drinking.

I talk back to my dad.

And my sister. And I'm clever with my mom.

I don't regret anything that I have ever done.

I lagged so much on making an art portfolio. That's a reason why I didn't go through with it.

I have a lazy side, that out of nowhere emerged, that I despise.

I still think about my latest S.O., but not in a way of attraction. I just miss the friendship we had.

I do, would like to have someone right now. I'm not worrying though, I'm waiting.

I love watching movies.

I miss how I used to read so much, even though they were Mangas.

I've made it a severe priority to see each member in my family before I shut my eyes.

I love my sister SO MUCH, that I literally cry at the thought of her dying.

I don't really follow or care for politics.

I Myspace everyday.

I'm a true JOKER. I excessively joke and not a day goes by without me smiling. Many times, though, I cross the line and people get upset. To me, the bottom line is: a joke is a joke. And I ADMIRE the people who understand that.

I've been a victim of advertisement, propaganda, and mass appeal.


I guess that's all for now. I'll name this Part 1. I'll definitely continue it, but I've got Round Table and American Gangster waiting. Late!

Work tomorrow... about seven hours... goodbye Thursday.

Nice!

Today was fun.

I woke up and ended up not test driving any WRXs with Marlowe. Another time.

I started my morning off by hanging out a bit with Janet. I had errands to run and asked her to come along and she did. We went to the library, because I needed to, and found out that it wasn't going to be open for another two hours. That sucked a bit. Then, we went to Lucky and got things. After that, we drove around looking for a yard sale so I could get a wooden piece of furniture, for art, but found nothing. And then, I dropped her home. Thanks for kicking it Janet!!

When time came close to 2PM, I swooped up Marv and we went to Kuya Dylan's house. His house is nice and so are his friends. It was cool to hang out with him after not seeing him for a really long time. We all went to Gold's Gym and worked out. Gold's Gym is much more sophisticated in bodybuilding than the Y is, because it has way more things than the Y does. Its also cheaper monthly, but far from home. Marv and I had to go so we bounced.

We made it to practice by a hair and Marv was hyper. I'm thankful that we made it. :]

After practice, Marv and I went back to Kuya's and ate dinner; they barbecued for us. And, we also watched the Warriors Vs Lakers game. Tonight was also the first time I ever played Rock Band, its a sweet game. After all the bonding ended, Marv and I went home.

I was on 101 about four times today and none of those times did I do less than 75. Haha.

I sure used 'after' and 'then' quite a bit in this blog.

I'm so sore... and tired, as always. I've got work tomorrow so I better head. Goodnight!

At Here.

Work was cool, it wasn't that busy and the three breaks made things easier. I ducked up though. I would have been exact at the end, with a sneaky maneuver, if I hadn't stamped the check "VOID." That hella sucked, big time. Oh well.

I'm reminicing about high school. That 'sad' feeling of the end of high school is making its way. Damn, all I can do is await it. I feel like blogging about my years, but with all the diversity I just can't capture it all. Let's just keep rolling.

I love my Seniors, Class of 2008. I swear, I just truly love them.

I'm about to chill, and hopefully, chill with my nigs later.

Happy Birthday Ron!!!!! Take it easy brotha! Now, all LTA are 18. Cooooool. :]

Btw, I was late a few minutes to work.

Yay.

Just got home....

Last night was Battle of the Classes. I was fortunate to get out of work so I could perform. And, it was fun. It didn't begin like all the other Battles that I've participated in -I wasn't pumped up. Its because I wasn't ready. Haha, yeah. I messed up in every dance. :D

So everyone did their thing and in the end my class, the Seniors of '08, won first place. Congrats y'all!

Then, everyone went to the after party. That was fun too. And after, I spent the night at Neeks. Who, by the way, before Battle, Ron and I cut his hair and carved a Swoosh in it. Hahaha. He was hecka trippin when we messed up, but we fixed it and now everyone says its dope. This guy....

So I'm here now, hungry and tired. I'm thinking about eating breakfast, or lunch rather, maybe wash my car because she's looking awful, get gas, and go work. :[ I don't really want to work, but maybe today will be fun. I get to get a lunch break now, haha, and I'll be with more peeps in the box office. Plus, I'm off before the movie rush. Maybe, I can even watch a movie tonight.

Now, I'm on vacation. Spring Break, and the following Monday off, and no first, faculty schedule, on Tuesday. Sweetness. I definitely want to go somewhere this break. Hang out and enjoy times. But, I've got to seriously work on two research papers. Sucks....

Got in trouble in Business class with my group and we all got a zero out of a fifty point assignment. Damn Mufs Cereal. Lol. S'all good, I don't really care that much. Just that, my A+, yes A+, dropped to a B-. Gay!!! Ms. Perez said she's going to call my parents and I told my mom and she wasn't mad. Haha, yeah, clean conscious.

Alright yo, I'll be back later. Bye!

Walking.

I'm tired. Really tired.

My first day at work, last Saturday, was pretty good. Five hours. And I wasn't short at the end, instead I was over $0.05. Haha.

Battle is this Friday and I'm not ready.

I'm most likely going to be scheduled to work this Friday. If I am, I'm going to call in sick. I've got to.

I'm blogging scattered details since I've been away.

American History X is a really great movie. Fight Club wasn't what I thought it would be, even though it had so many positive reviews. And the 25th Hour was meaningless to me, just a plain story that takes place here and ends there.

I've got to write two research papers. Gay crap.

Oh yeah, I'm really tired and busy.

Today, I went to school, then went to the gym, had a good 'welcome back' workout (discovering how weak I've gotten), then went to practice at school, then home. No rests in between. Imagine my exhaustion.

OK, I've got nothing more. I'm going to try to sleep early. Bye.

Responsibility

So, I've got a job now. My first, official, employed job. Let's see how this goes. From me, mixed with the time, it calls forth a more responsible me. I've got to muster it up.

CAN NOT BE LATE to first, or miss it, again. Late on Monday, skipped Tuesday, and skipped today. All due to waking up late.

Ok, let's get on with life. Ciao.

Groovy.

Today was a good day. I woke up on time and wasn't late to first period. For second period, however, I was but it was excused. Jereme and I stayed two minutes after the bell looking over our grades with our teacher. He had left a binder that he needed for other classes at home and I thought of the idea that we could go pick it up and be excused with a note. Our teacher began to write us a pass and I asked for her to add a few more minutes so we could "use the restroom." Of course, we didn't use the restroom, instead we went to Jereme's house. The time on the pass said 8:15. We returned to school around 8:25. I told Jereme that I could change the 1 into a 4 so we could have more time, but that was too much time. I asked if he had a blue pen and he did, and it was a matching color. So, check this out, I skillfully added a curve on the top of the 1 and on the bottom, making it into the cleanest 2 ever. Seriously, it was perfect, perfect. That, was the slickest thing I have ever done the whole week, month, or year. No kidding. We walked into second period at 8:30 and watched The One Who Flew Over The Cuckoo's Nest.

After school met up with D and we kicked it. I washed my car at his house and we went to a few places for wheel locks. I also drove his car, and a turbo'd one for that matter, for the first time. I only stalled once, at the beginning lift off, because his pedals are much stiffer than mine and I have to press his down harder. Other than that no problems. It was funny because Mira caught me on the road and shouted, "What the hell!" as I drove by. She wondered who's car it was and I said it was his, pointing to D. That was funny to me. Later D ended up not being able to go to the meet but it was all good. Nice rims brotha.

Anna and I hung out for about an hour at my house watching That '70s Show. It was fun. Thanks for visiting Anna!

The time came where I departed for the... Suby Meet! The meet was dope. I saw some familiar people and meet new locals that I'd be friends with easily. I also ate at Wingstop for the first time and it's good. I had fun talking to people and joking around with my friend Daniel. PDM FTW is all I can say. Its tight to see the Subaru community gather. One thing that ended my time there happily was that a mod on the forums said that my car was the cleanest one there, he even said "seriously." That was cool to me. Haha. Its cool because he's a mod, who are people that are "up there," and that he drives an STI and that I'm just an NA. All the little DIY projects give my car its style. Thanks D for everything.

Leaving happy, it soon turned upside down. Long story short, and I won't go into details, I got lost. Lost bad, and worse that it was late. And even worse, I was pulled over by a cop. Not exactly pulled over, but pretty much what it is. You can ask me about this some time. Cut to the chase, I was let off because I proved I was honest and was given directions. I followed them, with doubts, as best as I could and ended up on Capitol and knew my way home. Yay... ahh, I can relax. I need a GPS BAD!

So that was my Friday. Check y'all later. Late.

Empty roads.

Woke up early to kick it with D. We planned to have a photoshoot of our slabs, but in the end it didn't happen. Instead, we hung out doing this and that and when here and there. It all wasn't too long. It made my morning.

It was then afternoon, and I was home. I pondered, what to do? The day was open. My father and sister both left after I got home, so I became home alone. Eventually, my tired body got the best of me and I took a nap, and I woke up almost three hours later.

I applied to places where I'd like to work and I thought that they never got back to me. Actually, one place did, last Tuesday, and I only heard the message they left today. Damn, that sucked, because the lady wanted me to call back so she could talk to me. I felt like giving up because five days had passed. But, with encouragement, I still called and now I've got an interview Monday at 9 AM, which I think I need to move to 9:30 or 10.

Night fell and I went out, after mowing the lawn (which I'm pro at by the way...), to watch Vantage Point with Ron. Again, he hooked it up with free food and a ticket, and tokens to play some Initial D. We raced and I was about to win, then he messed with my gears. What a sore loser.... The movie was cool, but definitely no one appreciated all the flashbacks. Cool movie nonetheless.

It happened again. Our plans fell through. Not even going to talk about it....

My friends are tight.

Drove around again and loved it. Kept up with, I mean taunted, a newer Mustang. Haha, that was only just for fun. I did it because I wanted to enjoy the ride, the road, and my own self. It's clearing, liberating. I...: Right on Aborn & Heritage Estates, Right on Capitol Expwy, Right on Jackson, Right on Berryessa, Right on White, and Left on Quimby. Yeah, I know, badass man. It was a giant square around the east side. I think I even polished my sense of direction a bit; it sucks. Next time, and yes there will be a next time, I'm going to keep track of how many miles I cover. Then, a better idea of how far and much I drove can be achieved. Man, I just love driving around alone and at night. Spacious, spacious. Adventure plus music. Finding ...yourself. Price -STFU.

Back to that one topic....

I know I said I'd stop this and not do that anymore -I know. Yet, I gotta be honest and say that I'm not fully away from it. I'm trying, and I've succeeded in the past with quiting, because that's all I gotten from you, but it just isn't working. Maybe this time it won't be so quick or easy, or maybe this time it's going to be something else. Frankly, I just want to be close. Why? To see that all these years of that feeling inside me wasn't worth nothing. That I felt how I did and got nothing out of it, not even the slightest bit. Do I really care, I ask myself and find that I can't answer it with a single answer. So, I don't know what I can do now. Senior year is going to end quicker than I know it and even if things became something... what then? Some weeks of school, most of summer, then college comes, and not to mention we've got to go through the motions. I know you're what you are and by being that you're expertise exceeds this region of colleges. I, well I probably am going to stay here, even though I've got the credentials to go somewhere else; that's another topic of its own. Anyways, my decision is still the same. Do not pursue.

Who cares, I guess, I just have to swallow it, and I don't even know. So....! Make V's out of your two thumbs and pointer fingers and put them together. Then, yell it loud, say, "Whatever!!!"

I am so tired right now and I "have" to wake up early again to work on my car. I just want to relax. Also, homework has to be done. Many things. Complaining? Only about the rest-less part.

Goodnight.